was awful.

Normally I'm okay with things like this. Normally I can handle closure.

But not this time.

It was sooo weird. It didn't even look like him.

His facial hair was gone, and if you knew anything about Braden, he was a hairy guy. He didn't shave.

And his hair was gone...

He looked ill too. Sometimes when you go to viewings the people look amazing and peaceful. But he didn't. He looked sickly, and uneasy. He didn't look like my Braden.

And the people behind Stacey and I said, "He looks really good, doesn't he?"

And we were both pissed.

Because those people couldn't have known him.
Not if they thought that.

Tomorrow is going to be really really hard.

 

Love you all.

What up.
Uhm so pretty much this is my Mindsay.
thingy.
And it's pretty sweet I guess.
Only I don't really get it.
Fer sure.
But uhhh, I guess I will just keep you all posted on how everything is going so far...

Braden's funeral is on Saturday. It's going to be hard... damn hard. And part of me doesn't even want to go knowing that I've found my peace with him being gone. But the rest of me knows I need to go, because I miss him to death. And I need to see him one more time.

I'm getting a car soon. So for those of you that actually matter in my life, we're gonna party it on up!!!  I'm very very excited. And it means I get to see a lot of you again very soon.

In the category of boys, I've taken a no-relationship pact with about three people for this summer. And I honestly love it. Right now, I don't even want to think about commitment to anyone, especially when they throw hissy fits and compare themselves to my exes. That pisses me off really bad, and it wasn't a good move (you know who you are). So yeah, no relationships = happy happy joy joy. And it just means I get to play the field some more.

I am looking forward to debate camp more than anything right now. I'm sold on going to Dixie State's. It's going to be excellent. And if Melissa doesn't end up being able to go, it's going to be Stacey. Which I am super excited for, because that just means we get to party it on up. I love both those girlies and I know I'll have a blast with either.

For softball, I'm playing for Bonneville's city team and the Idaho Falls Crushers. I'm pretty excited and I hope it's a lot of fun. I've played with all of the girls on other teams at least once before, and if I didn't play with them I played against them. So I'm hoping there isn't going to be drama on this team and we can all just get along and play.

Katie is leaving on Saturday, and it's going to suck. I'm going to miss her soooooooooo freaking much... I mean it's my little sister. I hope she comes back soon soon soon. Because I don't know if I'll be able to handle her being gone for too long...

Lauren is coming back in July. And I am soooo freaking pumped. I've missed her terribly over the past year, and it certainly hasn't been the same in Idaho without her. I can't wait for her to get here, so we can all party.

Oh, and for my birthday this year, it's going to be a big dance fest thingy in my backyard. And I want a ton of people there. So you better get ready. =D it's going to rock.

Well I guess that is all that is going on in my world right now.

What about you, kids?